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tawnya sutherland

How to Get Back in the Business Groove When Life Comes Unglued

7 posts in this topic

I thought I'd start a post so we could share ways we can get back into business mode when your personal life comes unglued. I want you to start being held accountable too by sharing our thoughts here.

 

As many of you know my Dad was diagnosed in last August with esophagus cancer and then died Nov. 28th. During that time all I wanted to do was focus on being with him and helping to support my mom/family. My business was the last thing on my mind.

 

Lucky for me I also complement my business revenue by being a Super Affiliate which helps pay the bills when I don't want to work ;) It helped to supplement my business for 4-5 months while I went on a personal hiatus. Here's a video to watch if this extra revenue stream sounds interesting to you.

 

As well I had a great team set up to outsource most of my work to keep it running while I was away. My main VA is my daughter Danielle who really picked up the ropes of my business. Considering this was her Grandpa too (she also spent 2 months living with him and was at his bedside when he died), I'm still not sure how she did it all but she did and is an amazing woman. Love you ;)

 

My point of this whole post is once your life comes unglued like that how do you pull it back together?? (We were just talking about this inside our private VAinsiders paid membership forum area too).

 

It might be a death, illness of your own, divorce, children issues, financial problems or other hardship that you have faced the past few months. Whatever it was please know we are here at the forum to support you in your times of need even if it is personal. I personally also have a therapist I see on a regular basis and if you can afford this extra support I highly encourage it. Mine has been a lifesaver to me for the past 10 years now and regularly go to her just to talk whether I'm in a good or bad state. Like we tune up and add new oil to our cars now and then we should do this with ourselves too.

 

Here are some of her suggestions that have helped me get myself back into business mode by working on my personal self first:

 

1. Spiritually Read. Start a daily reading regimen reading whatever book motivates and brings you spiritual awakening for 30 min. every morning before you do anything else (no text messages, facebook, yada yada). For me, it's my study bible so every morning I read a few chapters in it. Already read it once now (which was one of my goals last year). I also read other Christian books and right now am reading Heaven which is helping me understand more where my Dad is right now. Whatever you believe in that gives you hope be it the supernatural or another religion, read something in this area every morning.

 

2. Exercise! I know for me that exercise is something I really have to force myself to do. At 52 years old I find myself getting lazier nowadays plus not liking sweat exercise is one thing I tend to naturally avoid. Ways I've motivated myself to get myself doing it is by putting myself in a position of accountability with others. I bought a Fitbit and invited all my friends to friend me. I also started up a Facebook Group for Virtual Assistant Fitness. Now I have to exercise regularly as I'm accountable to both and don't want to look like a loser LOL

 

3. Plan a Trip. Whether it's a week-long Mexican trip like I just took in January or a weekend trip locally, plan one to happen in the next 1-2 months. It gives you something to look forward to and hope for in the future and acts as an endorphin to mentally keep depression at bay.

 

Those are my 3 tips to help you get you personally back on track making the next step of focusing back on your business again more doable.

 

I'd love to hear what you do personally to get your business mojo back so please share with us :)

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Your post really hit a nerve for me..so heartfelt, thankyou. I felt quite alone in thinking that I have to snap out of this greyness and get going and finding it hard. So this new section of the forum is very welcome and I hope to hear from others undergoing business ungluing.

 

Two years ago I had spine surgery and had a titanium brace (yea, maybe I am supergirl in disguise!) implanted in my spine and hips. It was an emergency surgery and was given one hour notice that I was to be air ambulance to Vancouver for surgery which caused abit of emotional trauma. After the surgery I had to learn to walk and am still not able to walk properly or sit for any length of time. In the meantime I closed my business because I did not know how I would be able to carry on. Money wise it would have been so very smart of me to have had an affiliate set up as you did Tawnya. Now I know better and am trying to set one up as well as get my business back in order.

 

Your get going points have a lot of merit.

I am reading two books , one is spiritual about the book of Acts and the other one is a British Mystery by Martha Grimes.

 

Exercising is all arm movements for me as I can not walk or stand straight. I use exercise rubber bands attached to my door handle to pull and stretch my arms and shoulders.

 

Slow and steady does it just like the tortoise and the hare. Hope some one else will share their story.

 

 

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Thanks Tawnya for being so open and sharing. As I know you know, but most others here might not, my husband and I lost a daughter just over 8 years ago. For several months I just could not focus or concentrate on my work. I was so thankful for having a group of VAs I could depend upon to look after my clients, handle my phone calls and manage other aspects of my business. It was a relief not to have to worry about that for awhile.

 

Like you I've found exercise not a natural or easy thing (I'm a tad older than you ;)) but Christmas that year, my husband bought me a new camera, a Nikon D90. My birthday had gotten forgotten as our daughter had died 2 weeks before, and I guess he was starting to realise that he'd missed other things in our lives. We were both living in a fog for sometime. The camera rekindled a passion I'd had at a much younger age and it also gave me a reason for being outside and for walking regularly. Today I still go out regularly and I take photos almost every day of my life. When I'm with my camera I can forget everything else that's going on in my life and focus on the moment. It gives me pleasure. Just today I went out with a group of fellow photographers to a beautiful garden of lakes and lotus flowers and water lilies. And recently I've taken up a fitness transformation challenge with my youngest daughter (who also has done work for me as a VA) and so it's added extra impetus for my fitness.

 

Also like you, I'm reading something of a spiritual nature every day. Currently it's a book called The Thankful Project written by church members of a church we used to belong to as well as a devotional called The Word For Today.

It is so important we do plan for times when we might not be able to look after our businesses - just in case. I nearly lost my business many years ago when my husband took ill and it prompted me to ensure I had some kind of plan for support if anything else arose. Life happens, but not always the way we want it to.

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Slow and steady does it just like the tortoise and the hare. Hope some one else will share their story.

 

 

Susanne, I didn't realize your surgery was so complex and debilitating and hugs to you on your recovery so far.
Keep at it slow and steady as we all know who wins the end of that race and thanks for sharing :)
We are all so blessed that we own a business that allows us to work from home even if sick.

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Thanks Tawnya for being so open and sharing. As I know you know, but most others here might not, my husband and I lost a daughter just over 8 years ago. For several months I just could not focus or concentrate on my work. I was so thankful for having a group of VAs I could depend upon to look after my clients, handle my phone calls and manage other aspects of my business. It was a relief not to have to worry about that for awhile.

 

Like you I've found exercise not a natural or easy thing (I'm a tad older than you ;)) but Christmas that year, my husband bought me a new camera, a Nikon D90. My birthday had gotten forgotten as our daughter had died 2 weeks before, and I guess he was starting to realise that he'd missed other things in our lives. We were both living in a fog for sometime. The camera rekindled a passion I'd had at a much younger age and it also gave me a reason for being outside and for walking regularly. Today I still go out regularly and I take photos almost every day of my life. When I'm with my camera I can forget everything else that's going on in my life and focus on the moment. It gives me pleasure. Just today I went out with a group of fellow photographers to a beautiful garden of lakes and lotus flowers and water lilies. And recently I've taken up a fitness transformation challenge with my youngest daughter (who also has done work for me as a VA) and so it's added extra impetus for my fitness.

 

Also like you, I'm reading something of a spiritual nature every day. Currently it's a book called The Thankful Project written by church members of a church we used to belong to as well as a devotional called The Word For Today.

 

It is so important we do plan for times when we might not be able to look after our businesses - just in case. I nearly lost my business many years ago when my husband took ill and it prompted me to ensure I had some kind of plan for support if anything else arose. Life happens, but not always the way we want it to.

 

Kathie Thomas not sure how this posted as a guest but it did. Maybe it was because I merged your two usernames here the same day you posted. I knew it was you writing it though because of your story and thanks for sharing with us. ;)
So glad you found an outlet like photography to keep you going. Which brings up a good point for some still looking for a way to help them cope. Maybe that way is picking up a new hobby or finding something that excites them (as long as that excitement isn't an addiction like drugs/alchohol LOL).
I love that your new hobby got you out doing something you love not to mention it also got you exercising without you having to think of it as exercise ;)

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Thanks ladies for sharing. I started my business earlier in the year and had very few bad months in the later part of last year, so had to take on a part-time job. Now while what I am going through is not as close to what you ladies have gone through, I am glad that you ladies have shared what have worked for you and other options to choose from.

 

I don't like exercising too but I do read my daily bread. I love fashion and travelling so I have kind of started to take on a course to help keep my mind off things for me when I am going through some things, I tend to like to do some things such as shopping and watching my fave shows to help keep my mind off my bad moments, might not be so helpful but when I do these things I feel a bit better.

 

Best wishes.

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Thanks ladies for sharing. I started my business earlier in the year and had very few bad months in the later part of last year, so had to take on a part-time job. Now while what I am going through is not as close to what you ladies have gone through, I am glad that you ladies have shared what have worked for you and other options to choose from.

 

I don't like exercising too but I do read my daily bread. I love fashion and travelling so I have kind of started to take on a course to help keep my mind off things for me when I am going through some things, I tend to like to do some things such as shopping and watching my fave shows to help keep my mind off my bad moments, might not be so helpful but when I do these things I feel a bit better.

 

Best wishes.

 

Julian, even smaller personal things can wreck havoc on our business life, don't kid yourself. ;)

 

Taking a new course is a great way to get your mind off old things and onto new, great suggestion!

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