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Levi

First press release - feedback wanted

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Its been about 15 years since I worked in the media so feedback is appreciated before I go and make a fool of myself! :rolleyes:

 

Its written for two newspapers - one is a local area free newspaper, the other is a statewide publication; both are owned by the same company

 

LJ

 

EDIT: I'm making changes as they're suggested...

 

 

PRESS RELEASE

For Immediate Release

 

For more information contact:

Levi J. Scarman

VA flex

P.O. Box 3489, Port Adelaide, SA, 5015, Australia

Phone: +61 408 488 930

Fax: +61 8 8121 8501

Email: levi@vaflex.com

Web: www.vaflex.com

 

 

Virtual Assistance addressing financial and environmental concerns for small business

 

Port Adelaide, SA – Small business is a big part of the South Australian way of life, and looking into the future many small business owners and entrepreneurs see financial and environmental concerns. Cutting back on traditional staffing and turning instead to Virtual Assistance could address many of these concerns.

 

Virtual Assistance is becoming an increasingly popular alternative to hiring traditional employees as a way for small business owners and entrepreneurs to save themselves time, money and office space. Virtual Assistants provide administrative, creative and technical services as independent contractors from their own office space.

 

Virtual Assistance also reduces costs for small businesses by providing services on demand as independent contractors rather than working as a traditional employee, saving employers many employee related costs.

 

After working in office administration for over ten years Levi Scarman, owner of Port Adelaide area Virtual Assistance business VA flex, decided to go into business in order to help streamline office administration for other small business owners and entrepreneurs, as well as individuals requiring services on demand.

 

“Small business is all about building relationships; building relationships with clients is mutually beneficial. I've always had an interest in helping others and Virtual Assistance gives me the opportunity to do what I love at the same time. Its very satisfying to know that you are helping other small businesses succeed,” Scarman says.

 

Working remotely, typically from home offices, Virtual Assistants are able to reduce their environmental impact through less travel, smaller offices and less paper wastage. Scarman says it is important to him to be mindful about how he works and how it affects the environment.

 

“I do as much as I can to reduce my impact on our environment by using recycled materials where possible, participating in local recycling programs and working electronically as much as I can. I also use energy efficient lighting and participate in Lights Off Australia,” says Scarman.

 

“It's vital that I do what I can to preserve the environment for my future children. I want them to have the chance to see the Port River dolphins and want them to know that I did what I could to help protect the world around us,” he adds.

 

Levi Scarman is a Virtual Assistant based in the Port Adelaide area, SA, Australia, who works globally and specialises in designing marketing materials for small business, and writing and editing services. His business website is http://www.vaflex.com

 

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Nice job at finding a way to put a new spin on the VA angle, Levi. I never thought of VAs as being environmentally friendly, but I guess they are! :)

 

I thought the wording at the beginning of this sentence was a bit awkward: "Working remotely, and most working in home offices, Virtual Assistants..."

 

What about "Working remotely, typically from home offices, Virtual Assistants..."

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1. Port Adelaide, SA – Small business is a big part of the South Australian way of life, and looking into the future many small business owners and entrepreneurs see financial and environmental concerns. Cutting back on traditional staffing and turning instead to Virtual Assistance could be the answer for many of them.

 

 

2. Working remotely, and most working in home offices, Virtual Assistants are able to reduce their environmental impact through less travel, smaller offices and less paper wastage. Scarman says it is important to him to be mindful about how he works and how it affects the environment.

 

3, “Its vital that I do what I can to preserve the environment for my future children. ...

 

Hi, Levi. Great release. I have just a couple of suggestions for you.

 

1, The first is strictly a personal response, in that I react emotionally to any claim to be "the answer" to large-scale problems. Just quirky, I guess. Maybe 'an effective answer', rather than the answer.

 

2, The wording here is a little awkward. Maybe 'Working remotely, most from home offices, Virtual' would be a little beter.

 

3. Last, 'its' is possessive. Add the ' to show a contraction for it is vital.

 

Great release, and I love tying in the environmental impact. I hope you get a great response.

 

Martha

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Nice job at finding a way to put a new spin on the VA angle, Levi. I never thought of VAs as being environmentally friendly, but I guess they are! :)

 

I thought the wording at the beginning of this sentence was a bit awkward: "Working remotely, and most working in home offices, Virtual Assistants..."

 

What about "Working remotely, typically from home offices, Virtual Assistants..."

 

 

Thanks Leanne, I am going to go with your suggestion on that sentence!

 

LJ

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1. Port Adelaide, SA – Small business is a big part of the South Australian way of life, and looking into the future many small business owners and entrepreneurs see financial and environmental concerns. Cutting back on traditional staffing and turning instead to Virtual Assistance could be the answer for many of them.

 

 

2. Working remotely, and most working in home offices, Virtual Assistants are able to reduce their environmental impact through less travel, smaller offices and less paper wastage. Scarman says it is important to him to be mindful about how he works and how it affects the environment.

 

3, “Its vital that I do what I can to preserve the environment for my future children. ...

 

Hi, Levi. Great release. I have just a couple of suggestions for you.

 

1, The first is strictly a personal response, in that I react emotionally to any claim to be "the answer" to large-scale problems. Just quirky, I guess. Maybe 'an effective answer', rather than the answer.

 

2, The wording here is a little awkward. Maybe 'Working remotely, most from home offices, Virtual' would be a little beter.

 

3. Last, 'its' is possessive. Add the ' to show a contraction for it is vital.

 

Great release, and I love tying in the environmental impact. I hope you get a great response.

 

Martha

 

Thanks for your feedback, Martha.

 

1. I understand where you are coming from on this, I think I'm going to change the headline to "Virtual Assistance addressing financial and environmental concerns for small business" and change the second sentence to "Cutting back on traditional staffing and turning instead to Virtual Assistance could address many of these concerns."

 

2. I am changing this sentence to Leanne's suggestion above, "Working remotely, typically from home offices, Virtual Assistants ..."

 

3. Totally missed this one!

 

Thanks again for your feedback, much appreciated

 

LJ

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Hi Levi,

 

I have a totally different take on your release and suggest that since "the environmental impact" is a unique consideration and one that isn't "pitched" often via this industry, I suggest that you focus on the theme of how working with a VA impacts the environment -- using examples (and add a few more) you have already included. I would also add a few statistics about how if more entrepreneurs worked with a VA they could reduce smog, or save trees, etc. (Now, I hate to give you more work, but believe you will receive a larger response and potentially coverage, by changing your headline, adding a sub-headline and then focusing your first paragraph -- on the relationship between the environment and your business.)

 

Place your quote about preserving the environment for your children higher in the release -- as it is an impactful statement.

 

Next, I would send the article specifically to the small business editors or environment-focused editors/reporters (need to conduct research). Finally, I would expand my reach and send to environmental-focused groups, magazines, etc. -- as they may want to run a feature article on your new-age business and its environmental connection.

 

My mind is spinning around how you can really take this angle and run it (under various themes) to publications and organizations throughout Australia.

 

If you'd like to discuss the possibilities offlist, contact me via skype at the24hoursecretary -- or email at sharon@the24hoursecretary.com.

 

I hope this helps,

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Hi Sharon

 

This actually helps a great deal. I was thinking when reading it back that it seems a bit too 'empty' on both angles and was wondering if I should break it into two different press releases. I think I might think about this over the weekend and come back to it Monday to do some research into the environmental angle. Thanks for your input, and I may well contact you offlist!

 

LJ

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